Are overweight females attractive?

Dear Mr Bitter Guy,

I am overweight- so i work hard on making sure i wear nice clothes- and ALWAYS do my hair and makeup before going out- I really do think I have a great personality- I know it is my weight that makes guys not attracted to me- and as hard as i try to exercise- and diet- i just feel like i need to find someone and be happy how i am right now- how do I do that as an overweight female?

Mr Bitter Guy Says:

Finding someone is easy. Finding the 'right' someone is the tricky thing.

It's like telesales. Everyone hates those people who phone you up in the middle of your favorite show trying to sell you new windows,but look at it from their point of view:

These people are hated by everyone, have to pitch their product to people who don't want to know and they're under pressure to make their sales quotas. They just don't give up.

But cold-calling must work or companies wouldn't do it.

The average telephone-marketeer will call 100 people before they'll even talk to someone who's vaguely interested. Out of those interested people, it'll take ten of them to find only one who's actually considering buying whatever product is being offered. And out of those, only one in three will actually purchase.

So to find 1 paying customer, 3,000 people need to be called.

So start phoning random men.

The Answer Chick says:

It seems that you're doing all the right things, and it's refreshing to see someone who's making the effort. It's unfortunate that overweight people get a bad rap in today's society, but it's still a sad fact of life that people who are overweight often get treated as second-class citizens -- especially by the opposite sex.

Presenting yourself well and making an effort to live healthily will get you to where you want to be. But it's a long road and sometimes it's difficult to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Just keep on keeping on.

This doesn't, of course, help you with your current situation. I know Mr Bitter Guy has a bit of an odd skew on things, but at the core of things he's right. You may find it more difficult to find a partner being overweight but it's not by any means impossible and should only be a small factor in the scheme of things. Self confidence is the real key. Sexy people are people who believe they're sexy -- not neccessarily the ones graced with a perfect body or a perfect face.

So just believe in yourself and go out and meet people so you can find that special man.

Being overweight increases your chances of finding an intelligent man

Dear Mr Bitter Guy,

I feel like when i was younger i was hotter, my body was more devloped and curvier and hott i used to have guys that swarmed around me and wanted my attention, now i feel unattractive and less confident ive been sick many times and lost most of the better things about my body and now i feel stuck in a relationship that i feel is holding me back from moving forward in my life.

Please help me find the anwsers to fix my problem


Mr Bitter Guy Says:

The better things about your body? You're stuck because you lost your curves? Because men now no longer want you for your jubblies? Gee, now you're going to have to rely on your charm and witt to impress men. Welcome to my world. Not that I try to impress men. Nor do I have jubblies.

And this is good news as far as moving forward is concerned. If you're worried about finding a new relationship, don't. You see there are two types of men. Type A that has a penis and a brain, and Type B who has only a penis. With a curvy, hot body you're going to attract type A and Type B men. Without a hot body, you'll only attract type A men. This means that you're going to get a man with a brain!

Do you know how rare that is?

To give you an idea of what this actually means, I found an online test from the International High IQ Society.

I did the test under these strict conditions:

• I DID NOT read the questions
• I DID NOT look at the answers
• I clicked answers RANDOMLY
  

I repeated the test four times to make sure I got a good result. I followed the same set of rules each time. I recorded the last attempt to prove the result. You can watch the test below.

WARNING: This video is real footage and is not edited in any way. If you are easily shocked DO NOT VIEW



For the four tests my results were as follows: 98, 106, 101 and 104. The average national IQ estimate for the US is 98.

Without reading the questions or answers and picking the answers randomly, my average IQ is more than 4 POINTS HIGHER than the estimated national average of the US

Go figure.

If you can!

The Answer Chick Says:

It seems that what's really holding you back is your self image. I'm sure you feel that if you get out of the relationship you're in, you'll be alone for the rest of your life -- which is never a pleasant thought. But disliking yourself and despising your partner is no life either.

Good looks aren't the be-all and end-all to life. A good personality is far sexier than a tight body. How many men have you wanted to be in the company of not because of their firm bum but because they make you laugh? This kind of sexiness is universal, and it'll ensure you're never alone.

The way you can get this personality is to be confident about yourself. Learn to appreciate what you do have rather than what you don't. Concentrate on the things you can achieve rather than giving yourself a hard time for what you can't. Do little things each day which make you feel more positive about yourself and put those negative thoughts out of your mind. Start off with small goals and as you become more confident you can achieve your tasks, make your goals slightly bigger.

You are what you do, so do positive, happy, fun things and you'll become a positive, happy, fun person. Over time, you'll see that you are a very capable person.

So hard for nice girls ...

Dear Mr Bitter Guy,

I was wondering why it is so hard for nice girls to get over a break up with a bad guy.you know the type of bf who cheats, never says sorry for anything, constantly degrades her.

I know you will ask, well why is she with him then. and i think that to a certain extent, most girls want to try to see themin their best light, and hope they can help bring out their best. eventually, with a lot of wounds and low self esteem we realize, we need to be with them if we can accept them now.. not hope we will find them acceptable later. Please just give your best break up advice.

I just broke up with my bf of 3 years. it was a very abusive relationshp, not physically but mentally. he went to strip clubs, dating sites, constant emails from other girls and i just found out hes been cheating. the shit bag wont admit it regardless or apologize.

I dont know why its so hard for me, but it is. I miss him alot and am very upset , but i dont think its sadness over losing him, just more of what time i wasted.

So far, what works is, making a list of the bs you endured, and keeping it handy every time you are ready to call him up. also-he claims i deserve it all, because i gained weight when we started dating and havent lost it. i admit i am over weight, and no longer attractive. but i just feel that if you love someone or so he claims, you would look past that. there is never an excuse to treat someone poorly,

i was just wondering, if a girl is ugly or overweight, but with a great personality.. if she does have hope in a guy being in love and staying true to her. as my ex claims, its impossible.

i think its bs, but i have been so naive about so many things, i no longer want to bs myself


Mr Bitter Guy Says:

Ugly, fat girls get laid all the time. And they have lasting relationships too. In fact many men prefer a cuddly cutie.

Do a Google search for "I love fat women" you get nearly ten times the results than "I love skinny women" -- astounding proof that 9/10 guys prefer a porky partner.

While the world tries to convince us that girls with toast-racks for ribs are super sexy, men are actually trying to find buffet-busting beauties!

So being fat is not neccessarily the same as being ugly. Queen Latifah is sexy and she ain't no bean-pole. Paris Hilton on the other hand is skinny, but she is not sexy. No, not at all. Not even slightly. Which says a lot because I'm a guy and anything with breasts I should find sexy. Put a pair of breasts on a chair and I'll want to hump it, but not Paris Hilton.

Fat doesn't mean ugly -- and skinny doesn't mean beautiful. But it does look like blonde still means stupid.


The Answer Chick Says:

Breaking up is always a difficult thing -- especially if you thought there was potential there that was never reached. You're always left wondering whether you could have done something different to have changed things -- and if you'd have done that thing, then maybe that fairy-tale ending would come true.

It seems you have your head screwed on right, though -- and seen the relationship for what it was. When we start out in a new relationship we all have high hopes for where it might go. And as we're getting to know the other person we start to realise there's more to them than the stranger we met. Sometimes the 'more' is good, but sometimes the 'more' is bad.

The trick to relationships is to enter them with an open mind. To dream of weddings and retirement on the first date is to assume you know the other person -- and obviously, when put like that, it seems ridiculous. Those dreams are not based on the other person, they're based on your own hopes and desires. You may well dream of a long marriage and a fun happy retirement with the person who you're dating, but until you know them, these dreams are just based on your own desires for your own future and have nothing to do with the person sitting opposite. Once you recognise that, you'll be able to see that some relationships just aren't supposed to be.

In your case, you started the relationship knowing what you wanted. You had the dream but you thought it was this man who was the cause of it. Over time you began to realise that for the dream to come true, he would have to be a different man so rather than ending the relationship, you hoped he would become a different man.

The 'dream' is no more than a set of things you want in your life. When you meet someone, you need to remember that they may or may not help you achieve this dream. In a meaningful relationship, the person you're with wants similar things and you naturally end up helping each other to your goals. If you need to force someone to change, then they're probably not the one for you.

You say you feel upset by the amount of time you wasted. This is a natural and common reaction for women who've been in abusive relationships. You likely feel betrayed because the guy you fell in love with tricked you into thinking he was different. This probably makes you feel a little stupid also. You feel incapable because you weren't able to change him and make him see the error of his ways. You'll be frustrated because all the effort you put into making the relationship and putting up with his actions were for nothing. I'm sure there's more as well, but the good news here is you're out of it and you can move on.

So move on to someone you don't need to change, someone you don't have to 'put up' with. And someone who can accept you for who you are. Relationships are supposed to be fun -- and if they're not, then there's something wrong.

I want love ... but I'm overweight

Dear Mr Bitter Guy,

Im a 21yr old African American overweight female. And I believe that my weight is the problem to everything. I can't find someone who will love me for me. I have a great personality which I've been told by many males but it never seems to go anywhere. I rarely dress very girly and im a home body. What should I do???

Mr Bitter Guy says ...

Your problem doesn't lie with your weight. Queen Latifah and Oprah get plenty of man-action and neither are svelte ballerinas.

A quick Google search proves that sex appeal is directly proportionate to weight:

• Search for "Fat sexy women" gives 439,000 high-calorie results
• Search for "Thin sexy women" returns an anorexic 346,000 results

The biggest fallacy of dating is 'opposite attracts'. We're not magnets. If we were, all the watches in the world would stop and sailors would get lost at sea. We attract people similar to ourselves. You are currently attracting men who, like yourself, don't go out. The chances of meeting someone by 'not going out' are poor.

• Search for "Going out and meeting someone" gives a crowd-pleasing 6,000 results
• Search for "NOT going out and meeting someone" gives 0 results!

If you want to appeal to that special man, you gotta be hot. Dress to impress!

• "Hot sexy clothing" results in 128,000 well-dressed, haute-couture occurrences
• "Hot frumpy clothing" gives ONE lonely, sweaty, t-shirt of a result

So simply by going out and dressing well you can dramatically improve the chances of meeting that someone special. If you need further proof, here's what Google has to say:

• Sexily dressed overweight woman goes out and meets someone = 17,000 score-laden, sheet-tearing results
• Frumpily dressed overweight woman doesn't go out and meets someone = 18 'hope the mailman comes today' results

So while it is possible to meet a guy by staying at home dressed in your old running pants and a torn, sweat-stained t-shirt, your chances are increased by a factor of nearly 1,000 if you go out and dress pretty.

My Boyfriend says I'm Fat

Dear Mr Bitter Guy,

I've been going out with my boyfriend for 3 years and I thought we got on real well but recently we've not been having sex. In fact he's not even kissed me in 2 months! I confronted him yesterday about it and he told me he doesn't find me attractive any more and told me I was fat. I'm not fat. I'm 153lbs and 5'4. But now he's saying he's going to leave me. What should I do?